the Diva Platform

Ah, the holidays.  Nothing like spending a nice Thanksgiving evening….outside in line (probably in the cold), waiting for the Black Friday sales to start.

I don’t tend to get into Black Friday sales.  There is no good reason for me to wait in line for hours to spend money at a store.  A $29 DVD player won’t do it.  I’d rather sleep, stay warm, and shop at a less crowded time.  That’s worth more than the big savings–and if it turns out that everyone gets fewer gifts because my dollar won’t stretch as far, well, that’s what happens.  [Incidentally, did any of you get the $29 DVD player?  Does it still work?]

Yesterday–over two weeks before Black Friday–the Tribune had a story about stores prepping for the big day.  If you read the actual paper, you also got a sidebar that I didn’t see online, telling about some of the Black Friday shopping tragedies.  Events like people being trampled trying to get Cabbage Patch Kids or Furbies (I haven’t heard of the Furby in a while) and last year’s trampling that resulted in a security guard death.

Most of these took place in Wal-Marts.  I’m not saying the Wal-Mart customer is more prone to mobbing, but perhaps you don’t want to be front and center when they open the doors.  Unless you’re a sprinter and can shoot ahead of the pack (which, given the state of our health and fitness, may not be so difficult).

Just be careful out there–someone’s life is not worth you saving a couple of bucks.

The Boy and I, like many of you, have a household budget that’s shrunk dramatically in the last couple of years, due to my career change and his lack of permanent work.  Therefore, we’ve had to really watch how we spend our money.

It’s funny, back when I worked at the Firm, we did a book about the “trading up” phenomenon, where people spend more in certain categories.  The concept included the fact that the middle class had significantly more money and would always be trading up….until the second book “Treasure Hunt,” came out, which showed how people managed their pennies and maximized them as much as possible.  The penny pinching book did come out a little while before the recession hit, but I think the two are an interesting set because with the second, this trading up/trading down philosophy really takes hold.  Basically, in order for most middle class people to trade up, they have to trade down somewhere. And when they lose a significant chunk of income, the trading down happens a lot more.

However, I think that even though times are tough for us, we aren’t trading down for everything.  At least, not in a way I imagined.  Sure, we don’t go out nearly as often as we used to, and our wardrobes aren’t going to get replenished as much as maybe they should.  Yet, there are some things I’ve chosen not to skimp on.  Those would include:

• beer/liquor - Again, we’re not buying booze nearly as often as we used to, but on the rare occasions we do get beer, it’s microbrew.  Liquor has to be a brand we enjoy–otherwise it’s not worth drinking.
• toilet paper - I’ll get Angel Soft (a cheaper brand), but I won’t go to one-ply.
• toothbrushes - I had to replace my toothbrush, and we had a cheap one in the bathroom vanity.  I bought a new Oral-B the next day.
• toothpaste - I used to skimp (bought cheap more because it only came in one flavor), but the dentist said I needed to use the Sensodyne enamel building stuff.  It did make a difference at my next visit, so it’s worth it.
• shoes - My everyday shoes are pretty pricey Merrells (not pricey as in $400 Jimmy Choos, but they’re closer to $100).  I love them, and they’re good for my feet.  I also buy pricey insoles (take expensive shoe and make it even more expensive), but it’s totally worth it.  My running shoes are also around $100.  However, even for dress shoes and loafers, I like to spend a good $50-$100.  Anything lower than that, and they either won’t last or won’t be comfortable.
• Diet Coke - enough said

What about you?  Is there anyplace you don’t skimp?  How about categories where you found it’s OK to skimp?

One “word”–and I say word in the way ASAP has become a-sap–that has really bothered me lately is “bogo.”  Do you know this one?  It’s the acronym for “buy one, get one.”  People used to say the entire phrase, or it’d be obvious that it’s an abbreviation.  Nowadays it looks more like a regular word.

Since I don’t shop all that much, I didn’t notice how “normal” it had become until one day when I was walking down State Street and saw a store like Charlotte Russe or something with it on a promotional sign.  ”Bogo?” I thought.  ”What’s bogo?”  It took me a second to realize it was buy one, get one.  Payless Shoe Source is also big on the bogo, and it’s really celebrated there.  Bogo is cool!  Bogo is what you want if you’re already buying cheap shoes!

Since I’m doing a little more translation work these days, I’ve become a little sensitive to English usage and what a foreigner would think if they walked around trying to understand things in America.  ”Bogo?” they might think.  ”That wasn’t in chapter 4 of our English 1 book.  It’s not in my dictionary either.  What is this bogo?”

It’s just kind of interesting how our lingo evolves and what becomes part of our everyday speak.  For me, I just wish we could bogo a different word for this acronym and sound a little more intelligent.

Dear CVS,

Congratulations from one of your loyal shoppers!  It took you quite a while to break me down before I signed up for your extra value card.  I’d resisted for so long because I was tired of having all of my purchases tracked by various loyalty programs–while it’s nice to get specialized coupons once in a while, I don’t need retailers knowing everything I buy.

But I finally fell for your program when you offered double bucks on prescriptions, and now I pull out that little red card every time I shop with you–and I probably shop more at your store because of it.

However, you might have gone over the line and shared information that’s not really fit for public consumption.

You might wonder why–after all, I do blog about my personal life a good deal, so it might be safe to assume that I’m cool with sharing information about myself.  However, maybe you haven’t read my blog closely.  I tend to not share every little detail of my life or exact names of people in my life.

That fact alone might tell you that I’m not exactly comfortable with getting a CVS coupon on my receipt that says, “You bought CVS tampons, save $1.89 on your next purchase!”  I don’t need to be reminded that I bought tampons, and I don’t necessarily want the cashier to know that I recently bought tampons because I don’t want the cashier to think he/she has a raging PMS-y bitch on his/her hands, nor do I need to be subtley reminded that I am either currently or will soon be a raging PMS-y bitch.

Perhaps you could reprogram the registers to print out a different coupon.  Something generic, like, “Hey!  By buying a CVS-brand product, you’re going to save even more!  Here’s $1.89 for your next purchase!”  I’d think of it as an even better bonus–like, what did I buy to get this big reward?!  (you know, just in case I forgot in the length of time it took me to choose the CVS tampons solely because of the $1.89 reward to get to the cash register and check out)  I’d think about buying more CVS brands because there might be other possible rewards instead of making sure I put that receipt where no one else would find it.  It’d be more money in your pockets, that’s for sure.

It’s just a thought that you might want to consider.  I’m availble for further consulting to semi-prudish consumers, should you need it (and my rates are pretty reasonable).

Thanks for your time.

Your pal,

Jill

Last week I did a fair amount of shopping.  This is actually a big deal for me, since I tend not to shop much (especially since I don’t have a ton of cash I can play with.  However, I did have time to kill on one day, and I had gift cards to use up on a couple of other days, so off to the stores I went.

After all of the excitement, I feel like a bad shopper.  Oh, not in terms of food/general supplies.  I mean in pretty much anything else you’d want to buy.  I don’t know what products are out there.  I don’t know what’s a fair price.  I walk into a store and there’s so much stuff that I don’t even know where to begin, not to mention avoid salespeople at all cost (more on that in a bit).

Although I normally don’t like shopping, it was interesting this time because over the last couple of months, I read two Paco Underhill books:  Why We Buy and The Call of the Mall.  Paco Underhill is a retail anthropologist.  He started a consulting firm that goes to stores and sees how people shop.  He can help companies that have a management team in a head office who think idea A for their store is great but it may not be translating well in the actual store for some reason or another.  The books are actually pretty interesting because he dissects why people shop and how they do it (and, of course, men and women shop differently, as do different age groups), and how lousy (or how great) of an experience shopping (especially at a mall) can be.

This meant when I was out, I noticed how things were displayed, how lighting was, how store associates acted, a whole lot more than I normally do.  Shopping at Macy’s (to finish off a gift card)?  Lousy experience.  True, I’m not a fan of Macy’s to begin with, since they changed the name of my beloved Marshall Field’s.  Still, the associate contact was minimal.  The plus side was that I just waltzed into a fitting room without having to ask anyone.  The minus side was that I didn’t feel like I should ask about anything.  Plus, a sale was going on, but the signage was really confusing.  Some things were a straight percentage off, others seemed to be a percentage off if you bought several of the item.  I really couldn’t tell where I’d be saving money.  Or is that the point?

I stopped into Sephora because I know I could use some beauty products–a facial soap, some moisturizer, a new lipstick, among other things–but I was so overwhelmed by everything in the store (I haven’t been to one in a long time) that I honestly felt like I was in a different country where I didn’t speak the language and had to examine everything product by product to see what it was.  But then again, I don’t speak “girl” very well some days.  Besides being overwhelmed, I also had to avoid the multiple salespeople who asked if I needed anything.  I didn’t, so I hated being bothered.  I know they’re just doing their job, but once I’ve said that I’m just looking, I don’t really want to tell two or three other people (and if I don’t plan on buying anything anyway, I hate it even more).  Needless to say, I wandered out of the store pretty quickly.

My last big store visit was Victoria’s Secret, to use up another gift card I’d gotten.  I was actually near the store on Friday but had forgotten my card, so I wandered through to see what I could buy with it (apparently browsing and leaving and coming back for a purchase can be girly behavior).  Plus, it was their semi-annual sale, so I wanted to use the gift card then.  I didn’t spend long there on Friday–saw that I could get a bra on sale (and that I had a few decent choices in my size) and maybe a pair of cheap (but cute) underwear.

On Saturday I went back and as I walked through the store, a salesperson (or maybe it was the store manager) asked what she could help me find.  Finally!  Someone who’s smart enough to help a customer correctly!  After reading the shopping books, I got a little irked over the fact that salespeople tend to ask, “Can I help you find anything?”  That’s a yes or no question that’s very easily answered as no.  When you ask, “What can I help you find?” it means that they know you want to buy something (even if you don’t know yet), and they want to help you.  This woman was really good–even pointed out what was on sale and that some of the sale bras were better deals than the semi-annual sale bras.

All the same, I opted for no help (mostly out of embarrassment–I had a $25 gift card.  I knew that to use it all up, I’d probably spend a little more than $25, but I didn’t want to be talked into dropping a hundred bucks I really don’t have–at least, not to spend on underwear) and wandered.  I found a bra and hemmed a little bit about the panties.  At first I thought I’d look at the really cheap ones, then I balked because I really felt weird digging through a bin of underpants to find the cheapest.  I then decided life wasn’t that bad and walked around the store for other options.  Sadly, all the other panties were at least twice as much, and if they were on sale, you had to buy five or so in order to get the bargain.  Not wanting to spend that much dough, I went back to the bargain bin, vowed to start submitting some more writing, and I dug around.

When I hit the pube, I stopped.  Yep, found someone’s pubic hair in a pair of underwear, which meant to me that the whole bunch of them were tainted, and I snuck off to the a table with some cleaner options.  Yes, of course, I’m going to wash everything before I wear it, but finding a hair in a random pair of underpants that’s for sale?  A deal breaker.

Anyway, that’s been my adventures in shopping lately.  I still don’t really feel like I’m an adept shopper–that in order to be one, I do need to browse first, then come back for a purchase.  I did feel more comfortable in Victoria’s Secret because I’d been in the store the day before and knew how I was going to spend my money.  Or I just need to go shopping more often to get more familiar with different stores and what they’re selling.  But I don’t think that’s going to happen.

The Sans sent us a package in the mail from Japan–in it was a banana pen (”because who doesn’t need a banana pen?”) and a Peri Peri toy.  Yes, from the makers of Puti Puti, the virtual bubble wrap toy that I had to find when I was in Japan, comes the virtual “rip a FedEx envelope open” toy.  It’s awesome (and has an on/off switch, which is quite handy for saving the battery)–like the package depicts, I’m crying tears of joy as I play with it.

The packaging reminded me of being in Japan.  The toy was in your traditional cardboard backing/plastic shell toy sleeve, but instead of having the plastic glued directly to the cardboard, it wrapped around and was taped down.  True, that made it difficult to break my toy free, but then I remembered the joy of what I like to call the “Japanese just-so.”

See, things are pretty uber-packaged in Japan.  Buy a box candy at the store, and you might find that the candy is packed inside a bag in the box.  Your shopping bag will probably be taped up.  You may wait several minutes while your purchases–no matter how small–are wrapped and taped in just the right manner as deemed by the shopkeeper.

It was frustrating when I first got there and had to deal with it, but I soon got used to the wait.  And I liked how retail employees seemed to take pride in making your purchase a little more special.  When you got home, it was a treat to open up the bag and enjoy what you purchased.

It’s far different here, where in a lot of stores, your purchases are shoved into a bag before they’re handed to you.  Even McDonald’s seems different from when I worked there in high school.  I learned that on every to go order, you folded the bag twice, with the fold going away from the arches (you presented the back arch-side front).  On the rare occasion that I do go there, sometimes the bag isn’t even folded–it’s as if they don’t want to get in your way on ripping through those fries.

Granted, that doesn’t happen at nicer stores–they still wrap and seal and slide your item carefully into a nice shopping bag.  But the same level of care doesn’t happen at every level as it seemed to in my Japanese experience.  When you stop putting care into one aspect of life, it shows, and shopping in Japan reminded me to start paying more attention to some little details–to know when to pull out the “just so.” I’m not 100% successful at it, so it’s good to have the reminder every now and then to care a little bit more than I do.

As I’ve mentioned before, my folks get about five newspapers a day.  One of these is the Times out of Northwest Indiana.  On Sunday while we were waiting for Easter dinner to cook, I grabbed the front section of that day’s paper, and the top story introduced their new columnist Jill Cataldo, who writes and teaches classes about couponing.  The story included this little bit:

Earlier this month, Cataldo presented her workshop to a full house at the Glenwood-Lynwood Public Library.

“Super-couponing combines buying items when they’re at their lowest prices with efficient couponing to further reduce the price,” Cataldo told her audience.

Cataldo showed the class what she calls “anatomy of a cereal deal,” in which it’s explained how she bought 58 boxes of cereal and 40 boxes of granola bars for $5.15.

“Then we ’shop’ at home from the pantry instead of running back to the store,” she said.

I put that “58 boxes of cereal and 40 boxes of granola bars” tidbit into my brain and let it fester.

After dinner the Boy also saw the story, held up the paper, and innocently asked, “Did you see the new coupon column?”

“You mean ‘58 boxes of cereal and 40 boxes of granola bars’?” I replied.

“Oops.  I’m sorry I said anything,” he said, after which I launched into a tirade of how much room it would take to store that much food in your house.  And I understand that I’m a little out of touch with what’s probably her target audience–I’m sure a family of four goes through at least a couple of boxes of cereal a week.  Still, you’re talking about storing a good three or four months worth of cereal alone.  If you do that with every product, how much room does that take up?  How can you possible go through everything in a timely manner?

My mother responded, “Do you want to go shopping in the basement for some Tide or canned goods?”

Go figure.  We didn’t “shop” in the basement on principle.  And also because our carsharing car was downtown, and I wasn’t about to haul leftovers and Tide and canned goods on the bus while I was wearing high heels.  Besides, I’m too old to pilfer from my parents’ stockpile of food and cleaning supplies in order to save a buck.  I came to this conclusion a few weeks ago, when my mom told me to bring laundry home on Easter so we didn’t have to spend the quarters doing it in our apartment building.  I’m too old to drag laundry to another state to save a buck twenty-five a load (or $2.50, if I’m drying it too).  I’m also too old to sleep on the floor (unless I’m camping or in a country where that’s the culture), and I’m too old to live in a garden apartment (”garden” is fancy for “basement”).  At this point in life I should be at a place where I can provide basic things for myself.  Granted, things may get desperate around here, and I may have to eat those words, but for the moment, I’m driving myself to earn money so I can live up to this “I’m too old” philosophy.

Anyway, I didn’t want to rant about the Super Couponer solely on the basis of 58 boxes of cereal and 40 boxes of granola bars, so I checked out her sites and read her column.  She’s got an interesting philosophy that you should sometimes buy things you don’t want or need in order to get something you do want for cheaper, which is something I’ve never considered, mostly because I don’t have space to store stuff I don’t want until enough of it stockpiles to warrant a donation to the food pantry.  Still, it’s an interesting twist and different from the same old tips and tricks you read about.

On the other hand, she’s offering a third class in her Super Couponing series that talks about “stockpile control” and “spousal resistance.”  I can only imagine what this is like, especially since it’s going to be taught by her 13-year-old daughter, who might have just a thing or two to say about that stockpile and what daddy thinks of it.

I told the Boy about “spousal resistance,” and he warned me, “I’m going to be that spouse.”  Guess I’d better get through those three bottles of eco-friendly cleaner that I got for five bucks (as opposed to $3.79/bottle) because with those, our little stockpile shelf in the closet is overflowing.

Now that we’re well into Holy Week, I’m starting to scramble to get an Easter dress.  I haven’t had a good one in a while, but this year I feel like I need a good spring/summer dress for special occasions.  I’ll also be at church all morning–handbells are ringing at both the 8:30 and 11:00 services–so even though I’ll be covered up with a choir robe, I still want to look appropriate for the most important day of the Christian year.

However.  If you’re any regular woman, you know that finding a dress might be a bit of a challenge.  Not only do I have to find a decent dress, but it also has to be a decent price.  I realize I’m Anthropologie age, but my wallet’s still back in Old Navy gear.  So I’m biting the bullet and hitting the off-price stores–T.J. Maxx, Marshalls, Nordstrom Rack, Filene’s Basement, Loehmann’s.  I’m even going to attempt to use a Macy’s coupon because I’m still working through a Macy’s gift card.

I have a love-hate relationship with the off-price stores because while you can find great deals, it does take a lot of time pawing through racks and racks of clothes to find anything worth while.  With the dress situation, I’m not even sure there’s going to be that much selection, which means I’m probably going to have to troop from store to store to find much.  Plus, I get demoralized pretty quickly when I try on clothes of any kind, so having to burrow like an animal through crowded racks of clothes to try on a handful of choices underneath horrible store lighting isn’t really my favorite way of spending a few hours.

The last time I was geared up to buy a dress, I spent most of a Saturday shopping for it, only to find exactly what I was looking for at the last place I shopped, Sears.  It was a nice dress at a great price, and I used it a lot, but talk about a frustrating experience for a non-shopper!  Plus, even though Sears does have some cute clothes and my beloved Lands End, I still sometimes think of them as the land of Toughskins and double-knit polyester.

Actually, I should really skip the Macy’s experience and just start my shopping at Sears.  I’d probably be saving both time and money, even with the gift card in tow.  And the less time it takes me to spend money and get out of the store, the better.  Becuase then I’ll probably need to go shoe shopping.

Mama sent me this story a while back because this is my kind of guy:  Whenever he travels, he goes to the local grocery store because he likes to be able to get some local foods.  On any given day, I do like going to the grocery.  On vacation, it’s on my “absolutely must do” list for a number of reasons:

1. I like seeing how other people live.  Part of this stems from often wondering, “Am I doing life right?”, but it’s also good to know these things for writing reasons–should I want to set a story in Florida, I’m familiar with Publix.  Germany?  Kaufhof and HL Markt and Aldi.  Austria?  Spar, Billa, and Hofer (which is Aldi).  Japan?  Valor.  You get the picture.  I also like going to the movies for that reason.  It’s fun to suddenly have to find an assigned seat or discover that the popcorn is sweet and not salty.
2. I’ve traveled enough to have picked up some favorite foods that I can’t get at home (or can’t get at home without a lot of effort/cash….honestly, I love a Ritter Sport, but they’re about $3 here.  In Germany–well, when I lived there, they were like 50 cents, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they were about a buck now.  I can’t bring myself to pay the massive difference very often unless it’s a major treat).  I like getting to buy them when I’m on the road.
3. I like to acquire new favorite foods.  The scale will confirm that.

And this habit of going to the grocery has allowed me to find some cool things.  When we shopped at the ABC in Hawaii, we got introduced to a number of Japanese products, which we could then shop for in Japan (Mmmm…Pocari Sweat!)

I haven’t really told this to the Boy, but I’d like to travel some places solely to go to the grocery store.  This is thanks to being a researcher for a long time.  A consultant asked to research a product or store, so I became massively interested in it for whatever length of time I was doing the research (Mama, who also did research, had the same thing.  When I saw an Eatzi’s opening up in my neighborhood, it warranted an immediate call to her because we’d both researched the place and were fascinated by the concept.  Pocari Sweat’s actually another example of this because I researched stevia, which at the time wasn’t available in the U.S.  Pocari Sweat’s sweetened with stevia.).

If the place isn’t near me and sounds intriguing, it gets on my list of places to go.  I was bummed that we hit California last year at holiday time because I didn’t get the chance to go to a Fresh & Easy, Tesco’s entry into the U.S. market.  I’m dying to go to a Wawa (a large convenience store), a dream I also feel stupid about because I’m sure people who go to Wawa every day don’t think it’s anything special.  Likewise Wegman’s.  And if I get anywhere near Fairfield, OH, I’m going to need a few hours to peruse the aisles of Jungle Jim’s. Look at that place!  They’ve got an Amish products section (including ostrich eggs, when available).  They have something called the Aisle of Inferno!  Award-winning bathrooms!  It even has its own monorail, for cryin’ out loud!  I think Trader Joe’s is a little slice of heaven; Jungle Jim’s is probably something beyond my wildest dreams.

Maybe it’s a silly way to think, but I honestly think that going to the grocery store is one of the easiest ways to expand your world.  Even in the Jewel I’ll find unusual products that are worth trying.  But since our travel budget isn’t getting us far anytime soon, I think I’ll be spending more time exploring the ethnic grocery stores in our city.  There’s Greek, Mexican, Indian, Polish and all kinds of other Asian places that have so many foods to try.  Flavors to explore.  Cultures to learn.