I was talking to my friend #2 last week, and we got on the topic of aging. We’re both in our mid-late 30s. We think about what it’ll be like to be older women.
“If you ever catch me wearing a red hat,” she told me, “kill me.”
With gusto, my friend! I too, am not a big fan of the Red Hat Society, a group of women who “have fun” and “embrace life” and be silly because all their lives they’ve done stuff for other people (raise families, clean the house, etc.), and now they’re going to do something for themselves, damnit! I can’t relate–and it’s not because I wouldn’t consider wearing a big red hat and purple outfit and possibly a boa. It’s because I’ve spent a good part of my life doing stuff for me.
See, I was single for a long time. I didn’t meet the Boy until I was 28, and we didn’t get married for another four years, so I only had to take care of me. No babies and kids, no husband who wouldn’t do anything, no huge house to clean and yard to maintain. Even though I’m married, I still don’t have the kids and the house/yard, and the Boy is pretty adept at doing a good amount of the chores in our apartment. If we do have kids, I’m fairly confident the Boy will be picking up more than his fair share of the load. So I don’t get this whole martyr attitude. Oh, I see it in my mom, who is not a member of the RHS–I think the DAR is enough for her–but that’s enough of an example to me to say, “Yeah, I don’t really want my life to be like that.”
Yet, I do think it’s a good idea to get together with your girlfriends, and when #2 and I are of a certain age, we’d like to start our own little group of broads who know how to have a good time: The Pub Crawl Ladies. Yes, we’ll get the old gals together, wear normal clothes, and travel to bar after bar in search of the perfect martini. As long as we can shake a leg, we’ll be shaking that cocktail mixer!
April 10th, 2008 at 12:51 am
I think it is funny that this post is categorized as a general rant and not a rant. Is it really possible to be both??
I think this generation, perhaps as a result of our parents generation, made it more of a priority to be individuals and do things for ourselves. Perhaps we saw our parents/grandparents and said, hey, I don’t want to live my life solely for other people. Mostly I think this is a good thing.
And I totally think your idea of the little old lady pub crawl is fantastic. I have this incredibly humorous image in my mind and it is practically making me laugh out loud as I sit at my desk right now.
April 10th, 2008 at 9:09 am
Count me in!
April 10th, 2008 at 10:04 am
Rant: I don’t like the Red Hat Society.
Not a Rant: Drinking with the Pub Crawl Ladies would be fun!
It does sound weird, but when I actually have a solution to the rant, then I feel it’s not so much of a rant anymore.
April 10th, 2008 at 11:25 am
Okay, club officially formed! I’ve already got the autobiography titled too: “From Pink Lady to Pub Crawl Lady: Still Screwy after All These Years.” Item of note: did you notice that, on the Red Hat Society [RHS] site (which I originally mistyped as “RAT Hat Society”…hmmm), they organize RHS members according to color (Pink Hatters are under 50, Red Hatters are over 50)? I wonder whether this is the senior equivalent of the Diva Platform’s Gold, Silver, and Bronze Circles (or were they levels — I forget)? Just a thought…
April 10th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
Count me in!
I think the RHS is in response to how those women grew up: get married, don’t work, have kids, stay home–and they didn’t have a good outside of the home balance. I have two kids and am technically “at home,” but I still manage to see friends and have a cocktail or two from time to time. I do wonder, though, what I did with all the time I had before kids.
April 11th, 2008 at 8:35 am
I want to join the The Pub Crawl Ladies - So many martinis, so little time!