the Diva Platform

Phase III of Fat Camp started today with a visit to the FC Nutritionist.  It’s always good to see FCN, and our visits are usually pretty short because I know basically what to do, she knows I know.  It’s just doing it.

The short story–and you’ll see the numbers in a bit–is that I’m still losing, and although it’s going slowly, I’m still losing.  That’s good.  That’s all we can hope for at this point.  My problem is a stressful work situation that will remain intense for a few weeks yet.  Then there will be a little break and it’ll start all over again.

FCN recommended I just try to be as structured as possible.  Have meal replacements on hand, especially at work.  If you don’t have that, it’s just easy to blow off the diet.  On the other hand, FCN conceded, sometimes going out for lunch can take off some of the stress.  If I do that, I have to watch portions big time, even if that means having half of the lunch boxed up right when you get it.

Mostly though, FCN’s message was during the holidays, try to maintain the weight (or keep losing).  Don’t let yourself gain weight, and that means trying to plan for meals and snacks and be as structured as you can (and exercise!).  You can become more aggressive in January when all of the hullabaloo is over (though FCN is not fond of New Year’s resolutions–another reason to love her!).
Some other notes:

• A hot drink, such as tea or sugar-free hot chocolate, can hit the craving spot sometimes.  But don’t use this as a craving-buster on a day-to-day basis because it won’t work after a while.
• I’m on a 1500-1600 calorie/day ideal.  If I went down to 1200 calories and was on that for a month, my metabolism would shift, my body would get used to it, and I’d be stuck on the 1200 calorie/day plan for the rest of my life.  I definitely like having my wiggle room.
• With the encouragement of FCS, I asked to go part-time at work.  I have my annual review on Monday, so we’ll see how that goes.

Now for the numbers:

Last month:  174.3

This month:  173.5

Yeah, not the best, but when I realize I’ve lost 17 pounds in seven months, I’m pretty pleased.  It’s a heck of a lot better than what could be!

I’ve got a new beef, albeit a small one because I tend to forget about it, but every time I see these, they drive me crazy:  LED signs with no purpose.

You know these sign boards.  They’re all over the place, usually on banks or businesses, announcing the time and temperature, or daily specials, or something like that.  These are useful LED signboards.

The not-so-useful ones that I think are the biggest waste of space and money are those like the newly installed ones at Union Station.  They’re mounted right next to the Union Station signs by the doorways, and they say (I kid you not), “Welcome to” (flash) “Union Station.”  And that’s it.  Um, we couldn’t read the regular Union Station sign?  The one that doesn’t waste electricity?  Maybe the powers that be thought we wouldn’t feel welcome if they didn’t say it in a special sign (and no, the panhandlers out front aren’t the Welcome Wagon).    Maybe if they had an electronic sign, we’d think they were all with-it-21st-century.  Again, no.

No matter the sign tries, it won’t make me feel welcome at all.  Why?  There’s fucking concrete barriers blocking up most of the sidewalk so that it’s a total pain in the ass to get into Union Station.  Who do they think they’re fooling?  Concrete barriers?  That’s not going to stop anybody from doing damage if they’re really set on doing it.  In the meantime, it’s the biggest hassle for everyone who needs to use the place on a daily basis.
Mostly though, when I see these signs I find myself drawn to the flashing lights, and then when I see that the sign says nothing useful, I’m totally ticked off.  Time and temp would be great to have, especially when so many suburbanites run to catch their trains!  How about messages saying if there are delays?  Something, anything other than, “Welcome to Union Station.”  How much money did they cost to install?  How much electricity are they using?  Is a mere welcome sign worth all that money?

I didn’t think so.

Sometimes I’m amazed at how steeped in pop culture I am. I read so much about entertainment and pop culture that almost any story can be about it. Take, for instance, this headline that was in yesterday’s Wall Street Journal:

U.S. Frets Over Sharif

My first thought? What do we have against Omar Sharif? I mean, has he been involved in a controversy since the Chicago Tribune tried to cut his bridge column? (and if you missed that, boy, was that funny. The Trib replaced a few comic strips and thought Omar Sharif’s daily bridge column was no longer relevant to their readers. Within a couple of days, it was back because so many people had complained about it. Either that, or a few board members’ spouses like playing bridge)
I had to click on the story to see that the WSJ was talking about Pakistan.  Oh.

Maybe I should just blame the media for focusing on entertainment and celebrity news so much.  Yeah!  That’s it! It’s not that I don’t want to read about global affairs, it’s just that Britney Spears’ problems seem much more vexing to the world than old Pakistan with its political crises, conflicts, accusations of terrorist harboring, and threat of nuclear warfare.   At least, that’s what I see plastering the newsstands and TV and internet.   Of course it isn’t my fault for not seeking out information that will help make the world a better place (though arguably, help for Britney might make the world a better place too).  The media really should do a better job of covering global affairs.  Which, of course I’ll read right after I find out how LiLo is doing these days.

If you were to ask me what I plan on doing to celebrate the holidays, I’d say, “Ring bells!” Because the handbell choir is ringing up a storm in December. Just take a look at the schedule:

Sunday December 2: Carols and Lessons — Chicago Temple –2:00 pm

Sunday December 9: It’s our regular ringing during the 11:00 church service, PLUS a few of us will be featured in Eric Whitacre’s “Cloudburst” performed by the Chicago Children’s Choir at their concert at the Harris Theater at 3:00.

Sunday December 16: We’ll be opening for the Mistletones at Navy Pier’s Winter Wonderfest celebration. We’re playing three sets in the afternoon: 3:30, 4:30, and 6:00.

It should be a good time. The Chicago Children’s Choir piece is really interesting, and we have a lot of great Christmas songs to play at Navy Pier. If you come out, please stop and say hello!

I have–or had–this lip balm I really liked called Vistive.  Vistive is some kind of genetically modified soybean oil that can be used in food products, but I got this freebie soybean lip balm that was nice and mild and made my lips nice and soft.

Lip balm is a product that can be difficult to find a good brand.  ChapStick doesn’t really make my lips smooth.  Burt’s Bees has a nice balm, though sometimes the peppermint flavor makes my lips tingle too much.  Carmex comes off a little heavy and has a taste that I just don’t like.  So I was happy to get this Vistive product that was just right.

Until last week.  The Boy and I were out getting lunch, and while we stood in a restaurant waiting for our take-out, I put on some Vistive.  Then it slipped out of my hands–and fell on the floor balm side down.  Yep.  It had to go.  Yeah, there was the possibility of cutting off a chunk of the balm, but then I still had to live with the knowledge that perhaps some floor germs had worked their way that far through the wax.  I couldn’t take that chance.

Somehow I think the Vistive may have just been a promotional product, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to get it again.  The quest for good lip balm is on again.

For some amusement, the Boy has purchased some DVDs of old industrial and documentary-type films. He’s got some Coca-Cola movies that are pretty funny (the introduction of a Coke cooler in the 1950s). One has a designer saying, “The purpose of any design is to create purchase appeal.” I wondered how that translates to today’s world. After all, Coke has just redesigned their 20 oz. plastic bottle. But does anyone care? Does package redesign do as much as it used to?

For me, package design is one way to get my attention.  I will buy almost anything, if it’s in a cool bottle, which is why we’ve had Jazz vodka in the house.  The bottle is shaped like a trumpet.  This was was actually a compromise because I had wanted the vodka in the tommy gun-shaped bottle, but that was massively expensive and wasn’t really worth it to me.

However, products that I buy regularly–like Coke in a plastic bottle–aren’t really special anymore.  Maybe I’m contradicting myself here because we did buy two six-packs of Coke in glass bottles–and not just regular glass bottles, straight glass bottles that are 1900s replicas.  And we’ll probably buy more.  But when I was driving down the Dan Ryan and saw a big billboard for the new Coke plastic bottle (it’s more contoured or has dots on it so it’s easier to grip or something), I thought, Why are they spending a ton of money advertising this?  Does redesigning their product make a difference?  Who cares?
Do you care?

Back in October, I got a pile-transfer package from Missy. Each of us usually have a pile of articles and assorted random junk (but it’s good junk) that we’ll box up and send to each other every once in a while. She sent me one right before my birthday that had a lot of great stuff in it, and by great stuff, I typically mean obituaries.

In August 2001 we went on a road trip to Salt Lake City, and the first evening we were there, we went to a little family restaurant for dinner. She grabbed a newspaper to read while we waited. She poured over the 3.2 alcohol laws articles. I discovered the obits.

The people of Salt Lake are really ahead of the times when it comes to obituaries. Since I was there, I’ve noticed a change in obits elsewhere around the country. Obits have become long, super-detailed histories of everyday people. And including all of these little details really makes them fascinating. When someone writes an obituary about you, and they mention things like, “She loved to play cards,” and “You couldn’t leave her house without taking home some leftovers,” that’s your legacy. It’s just interesting how these people are described in death.

I’ve gotten a little off-track because although this particular pile transfer did have some great obits (including one that mentioned every award this guy had ever won), the piece de resistance was a thin, gift-wrapped package with a post-it note that said, “Long story about how I got access to this, but when I saw it I only thought of YOU!”

I opened it up to find Grainne Cleare’s Duran Duran Scrapbook No. 3. Scrapbook No. 3 starts in late 1984 or so and is full of pictures and articles about the Fab 5. Every once in a while you’ll get some editorial comments where Grainne has penned in things like, “I still like him,” by a picture of Roger Taylor, or mustaches drawn in on Andy Taylor’s face. Grainne is apparently not an Andy Taylor fan, especially since during this time he left the band.

The scrapbook (which is a repurposed science notebook) isn’t totally full. Grainne stopped keeping it in 1990–maybe after totalling up how much she’d spent on Duran Duran during her years as a fan. All told, it looks like she dropped 1255 Irish pounds on books, concerts, albums, magazines, and the like. And since Duran Duran were going into a darker period in their history, maybe it was time to stop.

Missy got this notebook from her sister-in-law, whose ex-boyfriend’s ex-girfriend was Grainne. I kind of wonder where she is now and if she still has Scrapbooks Nos. 1 and 2. Or maybe, since they did have a big comeback in the early 1990s, it’s quite possible there’s a Scrapbook No. 4 hanging around. Please, please tell me now, Grainne, is there something we should know about this?

Yeah. Thanksgiving. Big meal with the family and friends. And booze. Lots of booze. We had the BIG bottle of bubbly that ended up being a bottle that my mother and I split. And now I’m a bit HAMMERED (and trying hard to spell correctly) and trying to stay awake enough to post this.

Thanksgiving was good. The family was up. The turkey got cooked. And the bubbly got opened. Did I mention that? Oh, well, if I didn’t, I’m sitting at the kitchen table trying to catch typos and stay awake (although I would love to just go to sleep). It’s a day like that.

Good thing I don’t like to sleep.

Oh, Friday is going to be one big hangover day for me!

UPDATED TO ADD:  Surprisingly, not much of a hangover!  Helps when you get twelve hours of sleep, and someone else does the dinner dishes (which I believe took two guys a good three hours to do.  We may have used about three-quarters of the dishes we own).

Yes, it’s Thanksgiving, which is a day we’re all supposed to sit around, eat a ton, watch football, and be thankful for the abundance we have. However, let’s talk about what Thanksgiving has become: The final barrier to Christmas holiday shopping.

I’m one of those people who doesn’t start shopping really early. I don’t like seeing Christmas decorations in the stores in September. I don’t try to find out Black Friday shopping deals. I like the Christmas season to start the day after Thanksgiving.

Unfortunately, apparently I’m in the minority because Christmas keeps creeping in all around. The Magnificent Mile Lights Festival was the Saturday before Thanksgiving. Christmas lights in my neighborhood went up that same weekend. The Christmas tree lot near me had trees ready to go yesterday. Yesterday! Do you need a Christmas tree before Thanksgiving? How can it possibly last a full month without drying out (especially if you have radiator heat)? I’ve gotten five million–and counting–Christmas catalogs from retailers, hoping I’ll drop some money with them.

A German colleague of mine who’s celebrating his first Thanksgiving this year remarked how interesting it was that Americans had this holiday that was totally not commercial. It’s true. There’s not that much money to be made on Thanksgiving–just food and maybe some tableware or a greeting card, but you’re not expected to spend money on this day. It’s kind of refreshing that we still have one holiday where you don’t have to buy a present in order to make it a special day.

But heaven forbid we spend too long basking in all that we have. We’ve got to get up early on Friday to get all our shopping started so we can have more more MORE! JC Penney and Kohl’s are opening at 4 AM because they know you’re just itching to spend money. After all, you probably just went a whole day without buying anything. Better give you as much time as possible on Friday to make up for it!

When retailers try to force the shopping and the “deals” down my throat though, it has a bit of a reverse effect on me. I don’t want to shop on Black Friday, and I kind of want to put off Christmas shopping as long as possible. It’s not that I’m waiting for prices to go down further, it’s because I’m sick of hearing about how important holiday shopping is to retailers and the economy, and that when people don’t shop, retailers get really desperate and then we hear crap on how it’s our patriotic duty to shop because that keeps the economy going.  I don’t really understand how my buying a $29 DVD player or three (or whatever the big steal is this year) helps the economy.  I do know buying a lot of stuff keeps money out of my savings account, which means less interest for me, and that makes me an unhappy person.

And that’s not quite the mood you want to be in during the holiday season.  Am I right?

I’m feeling a little bit of deja-vu here, so if this is a repeat rant, I’m sorry. Apparently people didn’t listen the first time, if I need to discuss it again.

I’m sick of gift cards. I don’t want any for Christmas (unless it’s the Barnes & Noble card I get from the Boy so that we can take the traditional family trip there on the day after Christmas). Seriously. Oh, it’s nice to basically have a bunch of money that you have to spend somewhere (if I get cash, I usually sock it away, and I don’t think to buy things like an Apple AirPort base so I can go wireless or other gadgetry that would make life a little easier), I won’t deny that, but the problems still seem to outweigh the benefits here.

This week I’ve been going through a bunch of gift cards–many received last Christmas that I still haven’t redeemed because I either forget about them or don’t have time to shop or don’t want anything from that particular merchant at the moment. However, now that some of them are getting to be a year old, it’s time to use them up before I get charged some stupid fee for holding onto them.

The incident that set off my rage occurred at the Apple store–and I think I blogged about this very thing the last time. I bought the new Leopard OS system and used two gift cards: One was brand new; the other I’d used part of a couple of days ago. The clerk asked me how much was left on the partially used card.

“I don’t know. About $30.”

“So $30 exactly?”

“I don’t know. It’s somewhere in the $30 range.”

“But you don’t know how much?”

WTF?! No! I don’t know how much! “I used it a couple of days ago. I don’t know how much is left on there! I can’t remember that stuff!” I was a bit loud at this point and wanted to add, “Look, I worked today. I have other things on my mind. I’m not fucking Rain Man! I can’t remember how much is left on this lousy gift card! I mean, yes, I can remember Shelly Stammis‘ birthday, but she was the formative person who introduced me to ‘Poltergeist‘ and ‘The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.’ She gets that sort of honor. If my Amex gift card did the same for me, I’d fucking remember the exact dollar amount that was on the balance!” I didn’t say this because I had a slight suspicion that the clerk had no clue what “Rain Man” is.

She sighed and swiped the two gift cards through the reader a bunch of times. I’m guessing (and it would have been nice if the clerk bothered to tell me this) that she needed to enter the exact amount of the balance into their register–that the magnetic strip on the back of the card no longer has the power to do that. After doing this swiping voodoo, the clerk must’ve guessed I had $20 on the card because that’s what she took off. “You have at least $20 on it,” she kindly informed me once everything cleared (and I had to fork over extra cash to finish the transaction).

So you didn’t use up the card? You mean, I have to call into the number on the back, get the balance (which is probably enough to buy a Coke or something), carry the card in my already stuffed wallet, try to remember to use the card–AND remember the exact balance so that I don’t have to go through this again? You’ve got to be kidding me!

I suppose I’ll just write the balance on the card itself in permanent black marker. True, it’ll look geeky, but I definitely don’t want this headache again.